Photos: Instagram @halfanidea

Who is on this trip:

The writer – Mother/Organiser/Travel ‘Project’ Manager/Sponsor/Financial Controller. Referred to as: Me, myself or I

The husband – referred to as: himself/Dad/hubby/the man

The daughter – referred to as: the girl/7yo/princess/whinger/puker/punk/card sharp

The son – referred to as: the boy/5yo/boy wonder/whinger/puker/punk/ card sharp

Itinerary:

Sydney-Delhi (for city break)–(Main trip Kerala state) : Cochin/Kochi– Alleppey/Alapuzha- Kollam/Quilon-Varkala- Thekaddy-Munnar-Cochin/Kochi-Delhi-Sydney

Dates:

20 Dec 2017- 10 Jan 2018

Season in India:

Winter

Average temps:

17-30 degrees

Exchange rate to AUD:

46-50 rupees per $1aud

 

Day 1

Getting there

Flight

12.5 hour flight from Sydney to Delhi (after 2 trains over approx. 90 mins)

Thankfully uneventful.  Seats were in rows of 3, so the kids alternated window seat (as 4 flights in total by the time we got to Cochin) and Dad sat in aisle seat across from us.

7 & 5 yo (girl & boy) are good ages to do long haul with as they like the computer games & movies provided and the 7yo also watched a lot Indian cartoons so was obsessed with the god Shiva & his wife Parvati.  Also they had their own devices available to them too.

They ate practically nothing as cute kids meals for vegetarian kids still don’t exist and of course they didn’t like anything in the lacto-ovo meal. Bread rolls & yogurt was most I could get into them and at least the 5yo boy loves fruit but not the 7yo girl!!

Movies for me: Wakefield (my favourite, Brian Cranston), My cousin Rachel (good enough), The young Victoria (good but no Crown), Jersey boys (Frankie Valli story)

Arrival in Delhi airport

Landed around 6pm local time but seemed to take about 1.5-2 hours to disembark, get luggage, get visas checked & change money (which went fast).

Don’t go to line that says foreign visas if it is in fact an online visa you have even if you are a foreigner!  It wasn’t very busy but the supervisor still had to kick ass to make the guys not go on breaks. Welcome to India time!

We changed our money with Thomas Cooke who gave a better rate the more you changed. Aussie Dollars no problem  They were handing me out 69,000 rupees in 2000 notes so I asked for smaller ones too & they provided loads of 500’s and 100’s. 100’s great to have for tipping so worth asking for smaller denomination notes.

Next we got a prepaid taxi so no need to worry about getting ripped off.  Many kiosks to choose from, we used Meru on recommendation from colleague in Sydney.  Car was total shit box banger but we didn’t care.  Cost 515rps (about $11aud) to go 10km but it also took 45mins!!

1. cause the crazy traffic/smog that is Delhi and
2. driver kept missing turns and there was some back tracking. So just goes to show, as this was prepaid, they (any foreign taxi driver) sometimes don’t take the long way to rip you off, they get lost! Using English language GPS in American accent could have been a factor too
3. did I mention insane traffic?? OMG

Check in at the Leela Palace, Delhi

So we rock up to the 5 star (possibly 6 star) hotel in this terrible car but no one batted an eyelid and for security everyone reasons everyone has to pop the bonnet at the gate for all hotels. Also there’s airport type scanner for bags going into hotel.  Am presuming this was all brought in post the Mumbai Taj Hotel bomb a few years ago.

So immediately there’s a concierge and bell hops etc. and bags are no longer your concern.  A lady greets you with a jasmine flower necklace and dabs your forehead with red powder.  You are invited to sit down in comfy chairs in the lounge and brought a welcome juice. To check in all you do is hand over the passports and sit back and enjoy your drink – no queuing at reception desks or anything so tiresome.  Can’t remember if I had to give a credit card too but they already had details from booking.com (some hotels hit me up for 1^st night before arrival so no need to talk about vulgar payment methods again!)

Fairly quickly we were shown to our rooms; we had 2 business rooms next door to each other.  I had enquired about interconnecting rooms in advance via booking.com and that was a no. Whether actual family suites exist I never got to the bottom of.

The man who showed us around sent up some masala tea (yum) via room service and by that stage it was well after 9pm and body clock time was 5.5 hours later so after showers in very nice double sinked marble bathrooms, and a quick bit of Wi-Fi time we each took a child and settled down for sleep in lovely comfy beds in our respective rooms.  Did I mention there was a pillow menu? That’s how comfy the beds were. Loads of fresh fruit and bottled water provided too by the way. Woke up a few times but that’s jet lag for you.

Day 2

First full day in Delhi

So hello as many courses as you like (especially in our 5 year old’s case) buffet vast breakfast. OMG yum. All types of food available: Indian, S.E. Asian, European, Savoury, Sweet, Hot, Cold.

Followed by hardest morning ever (not) – digesting, relaxing, reading, drawing, gaming, lying down, figuring out Delhi itinerary etc.

Then it was time for (more extensive buffet) lunch.  This one hit wallet a bit (breakfast was included) but OMG so lovely. We even caught the attention of head chef Mr. Jolly Singh.  Well the 5yo boy who loves his food did!

Then it was explore the hotel time – life size ginger bread house, gardens, Christmas tree and finally we waddled up to the roof top pool at 3:30pm. We were the only ones there apart from the very lovely staff.  Pool was a heated infinity pool overlooking smoggy city, so view not great that day, not that it mattered particularly. The kids were happy playing & splashing, parents were happy reading “The Times of India”, sipping lime sodas and having the occasional dip and play.  Kites (eagles) swooping overhead all the while.  One even came down to look at the 7yo – she was not impressed, reckoned he pecked her on the head!  (After, there were beautiful change rooms with special swim suit squeezer/spinner.)

A few hours later back at the rooms the housekeeping staff had been in and arranged our cuddly toys very cutely, kids loved this, also more fruit & water had arrived.

Later that evening while I was at the gym the butler came and identified himself to the family, 7yo loves the butler! Butler delivered chocolates and biscuits while we were at dinner and gave the kids a gift of a teddy each on the last night!

Yes you read that correctly, we also had sumptuous buffet dinner that night. Think the boy had 1 plate with 4 desserts!  Followed by another good look in the ginger bread house where they choose what overpriced baked German delights (possibly imported from Germany) they’d like me to buy – think Stollen and the like.  I said maybe not today, seeing as we were full as ticks!

You see why I had to go to the gym? Which was standard hotel gym but had personal trainer available all day! Spa looked good too but I managed to hold off!  Sauna & Steam room were great and there was shower head in the steam room so it was awesome to cool down while still in there! Naturally I had it all to myself.

At some point that day I managed to convince the hubby to do a day excursion to Agra (176km away) to see the Taj Mahal, leaving early the next day.  He had been resistant to the idea (as more travel & I already had 675km planned by road plus internal flights) but I think a private car and guide might have swung it.

Naturally I didn’t say much about the cost 40,000rps ($850aud) because I was justifying it my head that we didn’t go the last twice we were in India and I really really wanted to go, plus this was easy and anyway divided by 4 sure it was only $212 each, bargain!

But guess what?? It’s not bloody open on a Friday. It’s a Muslim mausoleum not a place of worship so I was surprised I never noticed this in my research.  When I told my Indian colleague (non-Muslim) back in Sydney he was surprised too so at least I feel less stupid now!

But I was raging with myself. This was the only available day we could go apart from today which was spent gorging ourselves! But no one in this family would have wanted to:

• Get up at 5am
• To go out for a whole day in car for a 400km round trip
• Lasting at least 8 hours
• After a long haul flight

So there’s that.

Day 3

Out and about in Delhi

Starting the day with a 7 course breakfast and Chef Jolly personally waiting on the boy with waffles, pancakes, cereal, croissants, fruit, yogurt, hot chocolate you name it…

We met our independent tour guide Rahul (called in by the hotel) and took a hotel car at 10am. 800rps per hour for the car plus 1500rps for the guide was actually relatively reasonable (when it turns on departure out they will charge me 10 times the cost of a regular taxi to the airport!!)

So the itinerary I decided on was based on:

1. Traffic situation
2. Location of our starting point
3. Distance to top 10 places (and from previous place)
4. Recommendations from Delhi-ites who live in Sydney
5. Patience of children looking at sights & sites

First stop I requested:

Akshardam temple (Hindu)

Why:

It’s a modern temple, opened 2005 and as we have seen older temples on 2 previous trips one of my Delhi friends recommended we do this. And it was great idea.

Summary:

Beautiful building, no photography allowed inside (hurray), plenty of signage, having our own personal guide as good too. View from distance outside didn’t do it justice as it’s quite smoggy in Delhi mornings.

Ladies go in one entrance, men in other. Shoes off but there’s a storage/ticketing system in place.

Lots of school groups there, so nice for the kids to be smiled and waved at. You could spend hours there and do a boat ride but pretty sure our 5yo’s head would have exploded if we did that.

The driver & guide however took us via the parliament buildings, Nehru’s house (1^st president after independence), India gate (war memorial) etc.  Guide explained that Delhi is like Washington and Mumbai is like New York.  And there is Old Delhi too in case you wondering.  This was a great idea.  We flew by Connaught place but didn’t stop as it’s pretty much a CBD area.  But you know being from Connaught we wouldn’t have said no to a photo opp.  Back in the car the 5yo loved monitoring the paper map, so he was happy.

Stop 2:

Humayun’s tomb (Muslim)

Why:

It’s the blue print for the (never let us speak of it again) Taj Mahal.

Summary:

Very beautiful building, the smog cleared in the middle the day too so visibility was great. Lovely stone work. The tomb is actually underground and overground is replica so it’s good to be able to wander around and not be desecrating graves! Not sure why it’s open on Friday’s though when’ you know where’ is not!

Stop 3:

Lotus temple (Baha’i)

Why:

• Architecturally beautiful. Built of 27 free standing marble clad petals arranged in clusters of 3 to form a 9 sided lotus flower.
• Recommended by another Delhi colleague in Sydney. Again modern building 1986.

Summary:

Empty inside. Open to all religions. Reminiscent of our Sydney opera sails only they are tiled not huge pieces of marble!! Beautiful, you see why it is award winning and one of the most visited buildings in the world. Huge queues though.  We viewed from outside which is what I wanted.

Stop 4:

State run Kashmiri shop

Why:

I love the Kashmiri’s! Also cause they have some political strife up there they don’t get as much tourism are they should so the government helps them out with shop in other states.

 

Summary:

We had lovely tea and viewed many beautiful handmade carpets. As we hadn’t bought any art in a long time we purchased 2 beautiful silk wall hangings, so one for each kid to inherit who were involved in the selection process. Shipped back via DHL but the Sydney customs took a cut! We had 23kg spare in the luggage so we didn’t think that out properly, d’oh.

I also got a beautiful pashmina which I had mentally planned to get in advance J so happy I found a classy one I love.

Then we went back to base for ($10) expressos, cheaper than lunch (ha ha) and a quick jewellery shop for the 7yo and to the pool for a *beer for the big people and for “the kites” to stalk the 7 year old!  The rest of the family took great pleasure in teasing her every time we saw an eagle for the next 3 weeks.  After more sumptuous dinner we saw that the butler left personalised iced biscuits and jars of sweets for the kids!

*On the beer front it was a very low alcohol consumption holiday which was refreshingly nice. Reasons:

1. There’s only so much Kingfisher beer you can take esp. after acquiring a taste for craft beer
2. Indian wine is not good – esp. if you coming are from Australia
3. Alcohol is relatively expensive
4. Didn’t particularly feel the need to drink on child friendly holiday

 

 

Departure from the Leela

So I wanted to fly with a decent airline to Kochi 3 hour away as I am so done with cheapo airlines where possible (Ryanair to Dublin-Pisa in 2011 finished us with that caper) and Vistara were airline I picked (Tata/Singapore airlines conglomerate) but unfortunately the times I could choose was early morning or late evening.  So I choose 6am which was actually brought back to 5:45am (they updated by text before I left Sydney) which meant we had to cut short our beautiful hotel by like 8 hours and miss pre-paid super buffet breakfast.

I didn’t see how I could a get taxi that easily at 3:30am from our gated “gilded cage” so opted for a hotel car. They were very proud it was Mercedes and charged me 5500rps for 10km, that’s $11.70 per km or $117 aud!!! Make of car has zero care factor for me.  As Europeans we have been in a Mercedes many a time!

I stupidly didn’t think to point out that I had already paid for breakfast which was probably the same price and try to make a bargain. So after all its loveliness I did feel kind of ripped off.

I said it was the one thing I didn’t like in my booking.com review and they replied with some stupid answer about security and that had they had other options – eh B.S. they didn’t offer any to me, other than a smaller car for 1000rps less which wouldn’t have fit us all plus luggage! So a disappointing end.  I did the maths and compared other 5 star hotel car costs we used and this was by far the most expensive road journey we did.

Otherwise we did love it. It’s the boy’s favourite hotel.

 

Kerala port of entry: Cochin aka Kochi– day 4-7

Airport security is high, an armed man checks you have a ticket at the door and looks at all your passports & faces, no ticket no entry.

Queuing & check-in is quicker in Delhi than Sydney international airport, although I expected as much volume in Delhi domestic terminal.  Vistara airline premium economy very nice, booked cause that’s what was available. No inflight entertainment so kids on own devices, they were pretty good but air hostess did notice how “alive” they were!  Vege food all good, pre ordered but in hindsight I don’t think I had to.

Nice to see sunrise from way up in the clouds, 5yo was amazed.  3 hours later: hello Kochi.  Got the hotel to pick us up as I could see it was 25km away.  Paid slightly over the odds but nowhere near $11.70 a km!  Driver was nice, journey was good & he pointed out a few things of interest, chatted to the hubby and the girl.  Boy napped, mother read the newspaper J

More warm welcomes to the Vivant by Taj with sandalwood paste administered to foreheads and nice welcome juice in lounge area while they whisked away passports – same airport style security luggage scan on way in, unobtrusive though.

Shown to our room… 2 single beds!!!  Called for the manager who checked us in and explained this wouldn’t do at all.  Luckily they had availability and we were shown to a 1 bedroom suite, with a dressing room and living room so there was plenty of room for 2 foldup beds for the kids.  Of course it cost more than I booked via expedia.com that made it look like the original room had 2 double beds, wide angle lens!!  But what’s more annoying is that I entered 4 people in the booking engine and had to specify kid ages! So what was point in that?

Anyway no matter, ensuite was a lovely big bathroom with a bath (that the boy loved) and double sinks and separate shower.  Master bed was a 4 poster with muslin curtains so naturally the 7yo girl was questioning why it wasn’t for her!

Fold up beds for kids were big substantial things with thick mattresses.  Housekeeping staff were very good although didn’t call themselves butlers this time, there was also a pillow menu!  They brought nightly chocolates and dried bananas and yummy sweet aniseed-y balls (that didn’t get replenished for some reason). Santa had one too though.  Also fruit provided which we shared with Santa & Rudolph as well.

Lunch was a buffet affair (1000rps per adult $22aud) very nice but not quite as good as the Leela. 5yo & I stuffed ourselves with desserts.  Think had gained 3kg by this stage! The man held back and the girl is a super picky eater anyway.

Pool was gorgeous with 3 elephant head spouts.  There was a church clock nearby that chimed the hour and the kids took it to mean elephant blessing time so were “baptized” by elephant trunks each hour.  Temperature 25-30 degrees with an infinity aspect that over looked the Kerala back waters (that you cannot nor would want to swim in).  We took it easy that afternoon with lime sodas by the pool, checked out the grounds and Wi-Fi etc. then forced small people to have a nap.

Dinner was, unsurprisingly, wall to wall buffet. The husband started really restraining himself on desserts by this stage; the 5yo old and I were looking at him like he had 2 heads!

There was an outdoor function (I think for a first holy communion) in the grounds that night so we could hear the music/people watch from the balcony which was good in between calls to prayer and Catholic Church bells in the distance.

Kerala day 2 (aka Christmas Eve) Cochin

After more “W2W buffet” breakfast we braved the outside world. There was kids cookie decorating and a post office visit run by the hotel available in the morning time but – tough luck kids -that is when we go sight-seeing.  I asked at the travel desk about transport. Options:

1. Get hotel car at a premium
2. Get an outside car for cheaper
3. Get hotel private boat (900rps/$20aud)
4. Get the public ferry round the corner for 4rps each!

So off went to the public ferry. Where I walloped my forehead on a cast iron girder but spent the 10minute journey in a blur of pain but no matter it was all pretty easy.  (For some reason have you to wait till boat going the other direction is gone before you can buy your tickets from the man in the kiosk though, it was not a busy stop.)

Got off the boat & went wandering, refused numerous tuk-tuks, saw loads of stray goats and dogs including some very cute puppies sheltering in a drain. Paths were pretty precarious.  We ended up outside a catholic church at the end of mass where we took a shade/water break.  5yo had had enough.  Relented & took a tuk-tuk.

Tuk-tuk man was nice, told him what we wanted to see – Vasco de Gama (Dutch protestant) church, Catholic basilica, Chinese fishing nets.  He was surprised we didn’t want Dutch cemetery and Jewish quarter too, I explained we’ve been to the Netherlands and Israel and even Berlin & Auschwitz so were ok, plus 5yo’s head may have exploded.  He (tuk-tuk man) did insist we go to the central laundry which was not in the Lonely Planet but he was correct as it very interesting, they even had irons with hot coals in the base and happily posed for photos.  They tried to get me to pose with the iron but that would’ve been taking the piss seeing as I so rarely do it, I politely declined.

The Christian churches were fairly uneventful which if you are Christian you’d kind of expect.  Vasco was a Portuguese explorer (we also encountered his legacy in Goa in ‘07) who was buried there for 14 years until then they took him back to Lisbon.  It being Christmas Eve there were church services on too.

In between churches the 7yo hit me up for an Indian outfit cause “how could she possibly go to Christmas Eve gala in India in western clothes?” How indeed?  So I just picked a tiny shop opposite the basilica and haggled for a gorgeous silk green skirt with gold trim & gold silk top for her which she finished off herself with a gold scarf (1000rps/$20).

The Chinese fishing nets (unofficial emblem of Kerala) while were impressive in their cantilevered-ness weren’t all that in the midday sun, plus I stupidly paid way over the odds for 2 whistles made out of gourds as it was hassle-y and tourist trap-y there.

After the laundry visit the tuk-tuk man asked us to go to a shop where he gets a kick back even if we don’t buy anything. Cue rolling of husbands eyes, but it was a nice big shop like the Kashmiri one in Delhi and we picked 2 Indian outfits for the kids but amazingly couldn’t agree on a price and wait for it… they let us walk out the door!! So they do have a breakeven point it seems and can go no lower.

While the haggling was going we lost sight of the 5yo for a while.

Dad: Where were you?

Him: Taking a selfie with that man.

Aka a nice shop employee with no ulterior motive – as we would come to see all over Kerala.  No stranger danger here!  Tried to explain to the kids it was ok here, so dunno what sort of mixed messages I’ve sent now!

Tuk-tuk man reckoned he could drive us back instead of taking the ferry so  I think 3 hours of him cost (350rps/$7) which I thought was ok.

More food and pool swims followed and then at 5pm we went to the complimentary tea service, which we thought would involve some sort of tea ceremony but no it was a nice cup of tea and a cake or savoury snack.  Then the hotel boat takes however many guests who want to on a complimentary 45 minute back water cruise at sunset.  This is when you see what the fuss about the Chinese Fishing Nets is about. OMG they looked amazing with a sunset back drop.  Our first backwater cruise was pretty memorable, what a great ride.  Our fellow travellers were French and Indian ex-pat Americans.

As we were leaving the hotel there was an off key choir singing Christmas carols and when we got back there were sound checks for the Gala happening where the awful choir made an appearance too!  We all dressed up, not that the 5yo would participate in any photos.  Gala kicked off about 7:30pm.

The Gala was a bit like going to a colleagues wedding complete with M.C. and a live cover band and surprise, surprise loads a buffet food which was lovely.  So this night cost way more like 4000rps ($85aud) each but I asked for a pizza for the kids and was only charged accordingly which was good.  A weird looking Santa gave out ‘bounty bars’ too.

The kids had a great night and never got off the dance floor!  I danced once with them under duress and won a spot prize of a weekend in a hotel in Calcutta!  (Valid Apr- Oct 2018, ha ha). We did have a couple of G&Ts that night but on a very civilised level.  7yo made friends with Sophia from England with who she shared a birthday but Sophia was 2 years older.  They are supposedly going to be pen pals.  5yo fell asleep at one stage and woke up while being carried up to bed, which he was having none of and went back to dance.  Finally wrestled them up at 11pm, reminding them they had to be asleep pre the real Santa’s arrival!  The girl was convinced she heard hooves on the balcony.

Christmas Day

Children amazed Santa found them and brought 2 small gifts each.  So were very happy people.  After more sumptuous breakfast, we were not up for buffet lunch too which I think was probably more turkey ham based, so I asked for club sambos & chips & lime sodas by the pool which was grand.  Very lazy day had by all, swimming & reading, 5yo even fell asleep under towel on a sun lounger.  Checked out the spa but there was a power cut for a while in afternoon so I took that a sign to not spend any money on expensive treatments.  Life guards were off duty though that day but the spa staff was not.

We did brave buffet dinner and played cards with our tiny poker sharps.  I think we tried the complimentary wine left by our “butler-not butler crew” that night and it was gak. Yuck.  So first ever dry Christmas since we were kids??

Kerala Day 7-10 – Backwaters Alleppey aka Alappuzha

When we came back from Fort Cochin on Christmas Eve a taxi man outside the hotel made a deal with me to bring us to Alleppey or Alappuzha 2 days later at 11am, but we were ready by 10am and he was waiting for us at the front door way before time.  So we checked out and they gave us all gifts – umbrellas for kids, spices for husband and necklace for me, very nice of them.

So 58km of interesting roads and towns took I’d say 2 hours, beach road where the Raheem residency was located was inaccessible due to road works so it took the driver a while to figure out how to access the building but he did.  We’d agreed 2000rps but he wanted more due to the mystery he had to unravel with the roads so I gave him another 500.  Then he volunteers to come back for us to go another 84km to Kollam a few days later for 6000rps, I politely declined and he took it like a man and went on his way.  (Kollam trip would turn out to be 3500rps by the way.)

So the Raheem Residency has long been on our radar because it’s owned by the red haired, Donegal Gaeilgeoir (native Irish language speaker), female ex TV presenter named Bibi Baskin.  So we couldn’t imagine what she’d be doing in India when we read about it over 10 years ago and remembered it sounded nice from whatever we did read.  So no she doesn’t live there, she lives in Dublin and she invested in it with 2 brothers from Trivandrum (capital of Kerala). The house had once belonged to a well off Muslim merchant family and when Bibi & co. took it on it needed serious renovation plus they installed a swimming pool and converted some rooms into Ayurvedic treatment rooms.  There are 2 restaurants on site which have a good name, although we didn’t bring our poker playing companions to the dearer upstairs one but it did double as the breakfast room so we were technically in it!  It actually overlooks the driver test centre, when I say centre I mean dusty yard and who knew they even had tests? I wonder when they move to, say, Sydney do they have to retrain to not make their own lanes or constantly blow horns?

The food in the downstairs restaurant we mainly used was nice but you know no 5 star buffet!  Open to public, regular a la carte menu, good selection, not that the kids had anything other than pasta or chips.  We worked our way through the vegetarian selection. Service by multilingual Noby and team was good but it could take time for the food to come, fine by us but not the kids so we taught them to play 25 too, as there’s only so much poker, beg thy neighbour & snap one can play.

Across the road is the beach, which, as Indian beaches go, was nice but had still litter strewn.  Indian Ocean looked very rough so couldn’t imagine going in.  Kids did try paddling/wave running away.  Kite flying was thing to do there which looked good.  Of course materialistic 7yo wanted one but we didn’t give in (have a few kites at home so we did go kite flying on first windy day at home on our return).  We went a couple of evenings and had ice creams and also got chatting to people who wanted selfies with the kids and even me!

Also nearby was a very interesting working lighthouse with a small museum beside it displaying the progression of light house lights.  Total nerds, we all loved it.  Didn’t cost much but it’s dearer for foreigners and you also pay for the camera to have its own ticket.

Town centre was a few km’s away or 50rps in a tuk-tuk.  We got a guy to give us a guided tour one morning so we could get our bearings and he told it was festival week and all the market stalls etc. came alive at night.  So we did go back one night and it was mayhem.  There was markets all over the street, which you’d assume was pedestrianized but you’d be wrong!  We had noticed 2 fun fairs on our “get our bearings trip” and after we passed the first one decided to walk to the other one instead mainly cause we had seen a Lonely Planet recommended restaurant beside it that morning.

10,000 steps later we had come in full circle to the first fun fair, never found the other one!  But at least it was all through nice neighbourhoods the 10k steps (unlike some past adventures pre kids). Poor children!

Funfair was AMAZING.  We started with the Ferris wheel which was terrifyingly good, then some chair-o-plane type things (which I thought would never end), then we went to view the wall of death – where there was not one, not 2but 6 vehicles flying around the walls of, what only be described as, a wooden cylinder 50 foot high with us looking down from the top, and holding out money for them to grab.  They wore no safety gear and even wore thongs rather than boots.  Very impressively 2 of the drivers were female. The 6 vehicles were a mix of cars and motorbikes.  It was INSANELY entertaining.  Then the kids and I went on that crazy rocking boat thing, the hubby who has worked on a funfair (the one in Paddington2 movie) has seen too much puke in these things so declined to join us!  This took up a couple of hours and the kids would’ve stayed for ever and were very annoyed when we said it was tuk-tuk time home for late dinner!  Highlight of the trip for them though.

So the whole point of going to Alleppey is that it is backwater central, so one morning we got a tuk-tuk to the backwaters around 10am (not crack of dawn as per the book), looked for a boat we liked the look of and went off for the day on what’s called a Shikara, which is essentially a low boat, covered with a canopy that you have to lie down while a man manually shunts you around the narrow canals of the backwaters (obv. bigger boats cannot go on narrow parts, so powered bigger boat is an option but that’s a different experience).  So usually it’s a 6 or 7 hour trip but I said to the guy 4 hours was enough (as I thought the kids heads might explode any longer than that) and he said ok but 5 is better as you will stop off for lunch so allow time for that. We agreed and on 3500rps ($70au).  5 hours ahead of you seemed a lot at minute one, but we each took a child and lay down one behind the other, slowly we got into it and the boy & I even fell asleep after lunch.  So it’s all about relaxing and taking it easy and spotting bird life which there were loads of.  Our captain was nice with no English but we seemed to communicate ok and even he posed for photos with us, on the way out he stuck to main water-way, occasionally puttering up to the banks so we could see how human life was there.  We passed loads of powered boats whose occupants all waved at us and we seemed to be the only ones in a Shikara.  Also we passed less friendly European kayakers.  Lunch was on a tiny island whose sole purpose seemed to be provide lunch for the boats. We mainly had rice & veg served on palm tree leaves & poppadums.  It was simple and nice.  Also we used our first squat toilet, which was fine too.  Not sure kids knew what to make of it.  On the return journey we really went down an intricate maze of tiny canals which was amazing and lovely and sleep inducing.  There’s a famous boat race there in August and we went around by where that starts under Nehru’s statue.  Soon the 5 (or 5 and s quarter) hours were over and we docked.  Naturally we tipped him as he had done a serious amount of manual work, there seemed to be a cartel of men in the morning when we paid who I guess own the boat but are not the worker bees.

That evening we made friends with an English/Canadian family and the kids all ended up having night swims.  They were doing the same trip as us but in the opposite direction so Cochin – Hill stations – Beach – Backwaters – Cochin, they could fly international out of Cochin to London via Kuwait. (We are doing Cochin – Backwaters – Beach – Hill stations – Cochin & arrive/depart via Delhi.)  Also they paid at time of booking their trip, to have same driver for 3 weeks £450 plus tips, which I was interested to compare (in my head) as we purposely decided to wing the driver situation, which was no bother and after wards I worked out our Cochin only transport came to £315 approx. incl. tips.  But, as you know, I had already paid through the teeth for 1 hotel-airport car in Delhi so swings & roundabouts!  I don’t think I’d like the same driver for 3 weeks as I’d feel beholden to him, we did see possible other drivers dining with their westerners.  We didn’t see these particular guys driver but they said he was a lunatic.  So there’s that too.

On our last day in Alleppey the girl and I had Ayurvedic massages; I had the shirodhara, where warm oil drops on your forehead and gets massaged into your hair (which I had been dreaming of) plus full body massage for an hour.  The girl had full body massage only (shirodhara not recommended for kids) for 30 mins which she loved.  It’s been a while since I had a massage in Asia and forgot there’s no western prudishness and you’re totally starkers, bar a paper disposal knickers – kind of like you have after you have baby only G-string shape!  The masseuse was an older lady who had seen it all and didn’t give a crap about big western boobs and flew past them perfunctorily, they are just another body part after all.  So once I got over myself I relaxed…a bit!  It was all very good.  The girl was alarmed when she had to take off her swimmers so I told her roll them down to knickers size and that was fine.  The boy sat on my lap and we watched her being massaged but he didn’t want one himself.  When I was having mine they are the pool with Dad.

The London lady offered to watch the kids for a bit that night while we had dinner but they wouldn’t have played ball.  Our girl wanted to do her own babysitting but you know…. Madeline McCann… so we do everything together!

Kerala Day 10-11 House boat day & night!!

Next stop Kollam 84km away.  So I had booked a beach place later in the trip and saw the owner Babu got awesome reviews on TripAdvisor, so when he told me had a house boat in Kollam and showed me how lovely it was via website I booked it.  Alleppey can be very busy/dear to get a house boat so I could see next port Kollam was less hectic where Babu’s boat was, so that was fine by me too.  I had also asked the Raheem by email before we got there who they used and that one got brutal reviews online.

So you don’t need to be on a house boat any more than 24 hours, I originally thought to book a few nights but that’s not how it goes.  As it turns out 24 hours is perfect.   Babu also sent a car at 7:30am (for 3500rps which seemed fine as it was 168km round trip for his man). Boat trip starts around 10am.

The house boat was gorgeous!  All the staff were amazing starting with Babu’s guy who takes the money there.  You need cash for this one 28,000rps plus tax for 4 pax (about $600au) but you have a private 2 bedroomed boat, chef, captain and guide/butler.  Also if you pay they’ll nip off to the bottle shop/off licence for you for some beers before you take off for your 24hr epic.  And they throw in an excursion in a wooden canoe too and informal spice plants talk.

So the boat has 2 double bedrooms with a/c and ensuites downstairs and a kitchen for the chef.  One bedroom opens out on to where the captain steers which he is happy to let you have a go of too. (The guide will even get out on the bow and photograph you too.)  There’s a stairs to the top deck from beside his perch and also another winding one between the 2 bedrooms in a little hall or foyer.  Up top is a covered area with dining table etc. and off that a little raised area (which is the roof of the kitchen) where you can lie out if it’s not too hot, and on other side of the dining area is an open air wooden deck surrounded by seating where you can lounge about.  This is where the 3 crew members sleep at night too I think.  The whole boat is wooden complete with carved bird heads along the edges and the outside is covered in what looks to me to be plaited straw.  The internal bedroom doors are beautiful hand carved heavy doors – both full and half.

So the guide/butler was lovely (whose name evades me now) and had good English.  We could see the water-way was much wider here but also much less busy or touristy.  We sailed out of Kollam passing numerous catholic churches, bridges, memorials, Chinese fishing nets etc.  We even waved at the guide’s wife who we could see standing at their house.  He had 2 sons also around our kid’s ages, so he wanted selfies with our guys which he asked permission for first J.  After a chat he left us to it and later brought us some drinks.

Lunch was amazing and sumptuous (we told Babu we were vego in advance), kids ate s.f.a. though, punks.  I even called into the kitchen to see the chef and he was amazing, it was hot in there too!  Then we played a few hands of cards with the kids, read, lounged, took photos.

3 hours after lunch we docked and met the captain of the wooden canoe, who was possibly off his head on paan judging by the red around his mouth but he was alright, so more punting around the canals and waterways via a bird sanctuary.  Kids played a great imaginary game involving leaves we could pluck off branches we were ducking.  We passed loads of brightly coloured houses, bikes and life in general.   We had to crouch under some very low bridges and we even bought coconuts pre-strawed from a farmer and his kids for a lovely fresh coconut juice drink.

Back to the house- boat for more lounging, drinks, sunset and once we docked at Munroe Island for the night we had an impromptu spice tour with the guide when we went for a little walk with him where the locals were very nice.  We had cows gently lowing in the night beside us too.  Then of course more abundant yummy dinner was consumed by lamplight and we had one of our kingfisher beers.

After dinner I was downstairs with the girl when I heard an “OMG” exclamation from the hubby upstairs.  The boy, out of no-where, had just started projectile vomiting!  I called the crew and they cleaned up in no time. The boy at least directed the vomit in one direction only.  I cleaned him up and got him into bed as he had spiked a temperature, he shivered all night under loads of blankets while I had to have the a/c on for myself above the covers.  As it was dark by then we all pretty much turned in.  The girl was not impressed her brother got to sleep with me but I don’t think she realised how miserable he felt.  Thankfully he didn’t puke again, had a few squirts out the other end in the toilet but that was it.  Temperature was back to normal in the morning but he didn’t have much appetite for a few days after.

So breakfast was at 7am and then 2 hours later we were back at the port.  Sad to leave the guys and the vessel but all good things come to an end.  Babu had a new driver waiting to bring us to Odayam beach at Varkala 26km (1500rps) away where his main operation was.

Day 11-13 -New Year’s Eve – Beach time

The trip to Odayam beach meant we passed Hindu festival in Varkala town where everyone wore yellow.  It was an amazing sight which I don’t think we got photos of!  We also passed men’s store “Hitler – King of fashion”, ahem.

We finally met the famous Baba at the Palm tree Heritage resort.  He was lovely.  Looked a bit different to everyone else -possibly Andaman?  Very warm and welcoming and nothing was too much for him.  There was no bureaucracy like handing over passports or money or anything.  He gave us a welcome drink and we hung out at the café/restaurant which was right on the clean beach which was rocky but had a nice enclave where you could body surf & wave jump.  After some watching some check out activity / the world go by our 2 bedroom villa was ready relatively quickly.  This was not a salubrious as our other accommodation but it was what you’d expect at the beach and our 2 rooms were connected by a shared bathroom aka family accommodation. We had a/c & fans and it was clean and comfy. The lighting wasn’t great but hey.  The house keeping manager even checked with me each morning what my requirements were.  This was the girls favourite place.

After a lovely light lunch of what was, essentially, starters (you can get tired of w2w buffet you know!) we all went for a sea swim, which I don’t know when the last time I have done that was.  The waves were strong and both adults got grazed somewhere along the line but it was fun.  After some exploring (and resting for poor sick boy) we got ready for the New Years’ Eve gala – but not before my princess hit me up for an appropriate beach party outfit!!  She looked great in her new Sarong and the rest of all got some fun jewellery – wristlets/anklets etc. – for the occasion.  The gala was good and Babu went all out with chairs covered in white satin and red bows.  A local dance troupe provided Bollywood style entertainment.  The DJ was brutal though! Beer was easier to get here but the bottle had to stay on the sand under the table – so dunno was that to get around licencing laws.  Although we did see the local constabulary eat there too, so who knows?  Loads more Europeans here – Russians, French, Brits, Scandos (all fairly foreboding actually) and I even chatted to an Irish woman in the sea who was travelling around with her young daughter for a few months.

The poor kids didn’t make it to midnight but were delighted one of the stray dogs adopted us and slept at our door.  There were fireworks at midnight which myself and himself got back up for and then we went back to bed with our respective children – we decided 1 more night monitoring was needed for the boy wonder.

 

 

New Year’s Drama

New Year’s Day the girl and I went for a really early morning walk in our pyjamas and watched the fishermen take in their haul from the nets, fascinating to see.  Spent the day in the sea and taking it easy.  At 4 pm on my insistence we headed to the next beach, kids took a short cut, the boy stumbled on rocks and fell onto a huge cactus.  Cue blood, tears and many many spikes in his little body. We went straight back to the villa but as the light was poor inside had to pluck the spikes out with a tweezers in the sun on the veranda.  This boy is a great patient when it comes to gastro related illness but he is terrible with needles and tweezers.  2 hours and much screaming and wailing later super Dad had all the spikes out of his back but he wouldn’t let us near his hand which had 8 or 10 black looking thorns.  People must have thought we were doing some weird corporal punishment as we had a bit of a concerned looking audience outside the villa (at the bottom of stairs that led up to our veranda – which was good for doing yoga on during non-crisis time).

At dinner I asked Babu’s advice on what to do and he said tomorrow bring him to A&E if the boy won’t let you take out the ones from his hand.  No point going to pharmacy or local GP.  He said he’d send a driver with me.

So next day, as his hand was stiffening up, we did just that.  We all went in a tuk-tuk after breakfast with a lovely grandfatherly driver and he told the reception guys in the hospital what was up and then they led us into A&E.  The doctor who triaged him was nice and I felt like a big white twat with her boy with a thorn in his hand when I saw a small local boy on a stretcher after some sort of horrible accident!  I was apologising profusely and they said don’t worry you were right to come but that we’d need to see a surgeon.  Paid for A&E which was like 170rps ($3.40au) and was shown to surgeon’s pre-fab office, waited maybe an hour – boy feel asleep in my lap.  Surgeon was lovely but said he’d need to do a local anaesthetic later that afternoon; else we could take our chances that the thorns would work their way out naturally.  We were going to mountains the next day and he couldn’t really move his hand so we booked in for 4:30pm.  But not before he had to have blood test for HIV etc. for which he screamed the house down and a security guard had to hold down his legs while he sat on my lap (me crying) and 4 nurses attempted to get a sample!  That cost around $1000rps ($20).  Then grandpa tuk-tuk man took us back to base where we had lunch etc.  At 3:45pm the boy, me and grandpa tuk-tuk man headed back to the hospital.  Dad & the girl went to the beach and exploring.

Back at the hospital we collected the blood results and were brought fairly quickly to minor-op theatre.  They put some anaesthetic cream on his hand and he showed grandpa tuk-tuk man some cool robot game on his iPad while we waited.  Surgeon got delayed by maybe an hour and was very apologetic and I was very apologetic back  – for us time wasting when he had people much more in need of his help than us!  There were around 7 people in scrubs and they told me wait outside.  After 10 minutes (of silence) they told me move to the next hall. Okay…. Then I could hear the screaming from 2 halls away.  The original Bedlam wasn’t in it!  I felt so bad.  But after 10 minutes it was all over and the surgeon showed me a piece of gauze with 8 or 9 black thorns on it.  He said there was more pale ones in there but enough was enough for the poor 5yo and he’d give me some antiseptic cream and they’d come out by natural exfoliation – which they did.  I was very grateful.

Grandpa tuk-tuk man reappeared and brought me to the pharmacy and the cream cost around another 1000rps and that was it, I do not know how the surgeon got paid.

So we headed back Odayam beach and resumed our holiday where left off and went to the aquarium which was great and was open till 7pm J

At dinner that night there was a weird vibe and it turned out one of the staff had been found drowned at the bottom of a well that afternoon!  He had drunkenly fallen in.  29 years old, the staff and Babu were gutted and in serious shock.  Put things into perspective for us I can tell you.

Day 13-15 – Hello Hill stations – Spices

Babu had yet another man waiting for us 1^st thing (7:30am) in one of his (Babu’s) own cars.  The car was all decked out with beach towels which we’d find out later why.  Sad to say bye to Babu, the boy even hugged him & Babu had a hard day ahead of him as his deceased employee’s parents were coming (we chipped into a fund for them as am guessing no workers insurance for seasonal staff).

This was our longest road trip 177km (6000rps) and it was very winding road up the mountains.  Both kids puked, although we caught boys in time but the girl was first and got some of the inside of the car – hence the beach towels, d’oh.  Think she had 2 goes.  After that we travelled with disposable bags to hand.  Luckily we could change her clothes and the driver just chucked the towel.  He was a man of steel and we didn’t really have any stops (bar puking ones).  We got to Kumily in a region called Thekaddy by lunch time to a lovely eco resort called Greenwoods.  Then he turned tail and drove another 5 hours back!

The journey up was very scenic and we passed a Hindu festival where all the men were topless and covered in lurid colour paint dancing through the streets.  Kerala is a communist state (so good for women) and has loads of interesting political posters and communist bunting.  The further up we went the more beautiful nature was with amazing flowers along the road.  Then we saw the sign for Connemara tea (so Lord Connemara got all over the empire not just to our Connaught) and saw the beautiful neat tea hedges, such a pleasing sight, like maze hedges but in uniform rows.  Also we saw cows sitting in the middle of a town, naturally.

So Greenwoods welcomed us with sandalwood paste and drinks and necklaces made of cashew nuts.  Again no family rooms but the rooms were massive – surely they could’ve put 2 fold ups in there? Another failing of booking.com.  We did have a nice buffet lunch there and the pukers had chips.

One of the main reasons to go there is to go to Periyar Tiger reserve – they were nearly extinct and now that are back up to 24.  But it turns out only a cruise is suitable for kids (treks would be too hard) and it all had to booked on the government website in advance with your passport number (to stop hawkers).  Guess what?  The government website can’t or won’t take foreign credit cards!!!  So one of the staff at the hotel had to use his and I paid him cash (2000rps).  Anyway good we sorted it.

The grounds of the place covered in all sorts of trees yielding interesting fruit. There was also tiny farm on site with special small Vechur cows whose milk is good for Ayurveda products, from a village called Vechur hence the name.  They had a fairly advanced ecological water purifying/reusing system going on too.  Swimming pool was nice but not heated (only one we encountered so was a bit of a shock to the system).  The air was back down to early 20 degree temps, but once you got in it was grand! I played water soccer with the kids as there were 2 goals set up.  At night there was cooking demo, a documentary on the Periyar tiger reserve and a traditional dance performed by an amazing 12 year old in a fantastic costume.  My girl loved it.  Dinner was back to wall to wall buffet but this one was only 700rps ($14) per adult & kids free (I think).

So next day (after buffet breakfast, natch) we got a tuk-tuk to the bus that goes to the port for the Periyar cruise (bus depo was close enough to walk so we walked back later and had a look at the town of Kumily & even took out cash from an ATM).  The part of the reserve where you get the boat is crawling with some very cheeky monkeys, who I think were having a good laugh at the tourists.  The ferries are a bit like steamers although for the first time this trip we had life jackets – the kids were playing sumo wrestlers in them. We saw loads of wildlife: elephants, bison, boars etc. and many birds.  Alas no tigers but we knew that was very unlikely at 11am.  Didn’t stop the girl having a sulk! A big sulk that other people noticed!!

Ended up having all western style lunch (hubby not best pleased with me for sullying his palate!) but the veg burger was made to look a big happy frogs head!

Anyway that afternoon we did an elephant ride at Elephant Junction – which I’m still not sure was the humane thing to do but they seemed to be treated ok.  And we had a tour of a spice plantation where 1^st we were the main attraction (while they rang for a guide to come) and are in 100 peoples selfies!  It was all a bit overwhelming actually.  The tuk-tuk who brought us to Elephant Junction abandoned us (which was a bit unusual) so we walked from Elephant Junction to The Spice Farm which was actually good wandering around country roads for a bit.

The Spice Farm was fascinating.  It’s amazing that what look like ordinary plants and flowers to us have all sorts of Ayurvedic  medicinal powers, everything from black pepper plants (digestion) to hibiscus (blood pressure) to drumstick flowers (natural Viagra).   There were also ornamental flowers such as the beautiful lady shoe that looks like you guessed it, a ladies shoe.  The 5yo was grilling our guide on what plants did what.  Afterwards I got some oil for aching joints.  They asked the hubby did he want weight loss stuff, ha ha (only chubby part of him is his gut).  Then they took loads of selfies with us!

Back at the hotel we hit the cool treehouse café for authentic afternoon goodness (coconut based snacks)  followed by onsite playground and that evening the princess and I went to another dance performance, the boys declined to join us, this time we saw a lovely 17 year old dancer.  We called it girls night!  We met the boys later for more buffet dinner madness.

Our last morning was spent at the farm, patting the Vechur cows and looking at chucks and playing in the playground.  This place had everything.

Day 15-17 –Hill stations – Tea Plantations

So the next car, I booked via the hotel for a late morning departure, brought us from Kumily to Chithirapuram (near Munnar) another 83 pot-holey km’s across the mountains. Cue more puking from the girl. It turned out the main mountain road was closed so we really were on the worst back road and it was very winding.   The driving was one of the perkier ones we had though and stopped at an altar to give an offering for a safe journey at the beginning of the trip.  We came across an elephant walking down the road at one point and also an accident off a motor bike but the driver & pillion seemed ok.

So 3 hours later and not a moment too soon we could see our mountain side retreat nestled in the Western Ghats called The Panoramic Getaway.  The Ghats were formed by very ancient volcanoes. Gorgeous 5 star place, with an actual family suite!!!  The foyer was gorgeous with glass drop hanging lights etc. incl. a foosball table which the kids were delighted to use while we waited to check in.  Naturally we were all feeling a bit rough after that journey so we took to our big comfy beds and watched movies- the adults actually watched “Speed” which was perfect mindless fodder.  Got room service for very late lunch and the kids food had potato cakes which had been pressed with happy face cutters, very cute.  We hit the pool pre sunset and had it to ourselves for a good while (then another family with kids, Indian I think, came out for a bit but didn’t interact with us.)  After an unmemorable expensive non buffet dinner, we hit the games room much to the kids delight, for pin pong and carom (Indian board game we’d played in a friend’s place in Australia) also there were chess boards and card tables set up.  Guess what was beside the games room? An adults’ only swimming pool!!! Where were these places when we had no kids for all those years?!

It had come to light that evening when we were dressing for dinner the hubby had left his best (aka expensive) shirt and trousers in the hotel back in Kumily!  So I called them and asked about posting them to Australia and they enquired how long we’d be in Munnar, when I said another 36 hours they said no problem we’ll try and get it delivered to you in Munnar.  So at dinner that night one of the managers came to speak to us to say he’d been onto Greenwoods housekeeping manager and a car would be coming to Munnar tomorrow anyway, so they would definitely drop the package in.  So we left a tip for the driver with reception.  That same manager checked in again with us the next 2 mornings at breakfast too which was very good and attentive of him.

So the whole reason we picked Munnar was to see a tea plantation.  We had already been at tea plantations in Darjeeling 10 years ago but thought it would be cool for the kids to see too, whether they agree I don’t know!  Plus you know, being Irish, we love tea.  So unlike Darjeeling there is not loads of different plantations you can visit but here it’s pretty much one giant plantation originally owned by a Tata company but now it’s a co-operative owned about 70% by the workers called Kanan Devan Hills Plantations (KDHP).  So the best thing to do is to go to the tea museum, which was very interesting.  Mind you Monty Burns would have been proud of the propaganda video and how great “the company” was to the workers – paying them in “itchy & scratchy” money at one point!  Anyway the co-op seems to be going good now so I’ll say no more about that.  Apart from museum artefacts you’d expect: photos, old tools and a demo factory, there was also a tea lecture about how you are making tea all wrong.  Cue eye rolling husband.  Still though we enjoyed it and there’s a tea supermarket as opposed to a gift shop you exit through, where we stocked up.  Tea plantations are so beautiful to look at, I love the ordered neat hedges, so the scenery was amazing.  And we had a really nice Indian ice-pop at the end, which I had to force kids to taste & then after much resistance they loved it!!

Again the tuk-tuk driver from the hotel abandoned us so we walked back the couple of km’s to Munnar central (about 12km’s from our hotel), with some complaining from the whingers.  So Munnar itself is a busy administrative central, not geared to foreign tourists at all which was good, we were wandering around in “real” shops and bought some gifts & trinkets for taking home.  We had lunch in a place I had noticed in the Lonely Planet which did a good take on Israeli shakshuka (although I think the hubby’s version is superior).  When we were done, there was no tuk-tuk’s queuing up for our business (again refreshing) so, we wandered out of town a bit and found one.

Back at the hotel I escaped to the adult only pool alone for a while, but they eventually found me!  So back to sunset in the lovely western Ghats in the family pool where I got chatting to an Indian/Aussie couple from Melbourne, with whom it was nice to compare notes for a bit.

Dinner that night was delicious in their underground bar called… The Underground! Complete with London Underground signage.  The tandoori food we choose was absolutely gorgeous and the kids had non spicy carrot soup which they loved.  The décor was very modern and the marble bar top was backlit.  They had some cool movie/music/TV posters up too (also some naff ones but hey you can’t have everything).  We had it to ourselves, the only catch was it was not a licenced premises; we did have some nice mocktail’s though.  The waiter was telling me this bar and the family pool were part of a recent extension (the adult only pool was originally the main pool) and that they were waiting on their liquor licence which was due in 3 months.  They had some humorous 1950’s style alcohol posters up too so we were like Pavlov’s dogs with the power of suggestion.  But in all seriousness it was kind of nice to have an abstemious evening in a nice venue with our little punks.

On our last day we were in no rush to leave as we heading to an airport hotel.  Checked out a late as possible, 11am I think.  Kids & Dad had another shot at the games room while I packed up tea and trinkets.

So the next car brought us our last 103 km’s by road back to Cochin (5000rps). Not as winding but cue more puking from the girl, but it was car sick as opposed to Delhi belly.  This time I was super ready with the sick bags.  We had stopped at Cheeyappara waterfalls and she was fine, although she looks rough in the photos I see now, then we had to pull in again to clean her up but she made less of a mess this time.  Driver was very nice and chatted a lot.

On all the mountain drives we passed pilgrims carrying their bags on their heads, intriguing to see.  The waterfalls were nice too by the way but when you’re used to Irish waterfalls where it rains a lot, no waterfalls in hot places can really be comparable.  Monsoon season might be different.

 

 

Day 17-18 –Farewell Cochin

So I had picked an airport hotel in Cochin with a wrap-around pool as I’d knew it’d be back to being hot.  Got to the hotel SAJ earth resort and guess what?  The pool was closed for maintenance –as in completely drained.  Now I get mid-January is off peak and it has to be done sometime but could they not have told booking.com or emailed customers to spell it out or maybe, I don’t know, discounted the bloody rooms?  The swimming pool was the only reason I booked this place.  So I let them know this and they said they could probably sort out access to a private pool later.  There was some palaver about breakfast vouchers which annoyingly you had to pay for separately and I had booked when prompted by booking.com.  Once that was sorted we went to the rooms (again no family rooms an option), the playground and for some lunch. The hotel claimed to be 5 star but it was not, maybe it was in the ‘80’s or something, however the lunch and dinner costs were still at expensive rates (a la carte).  There was only the one restaurant open which was decorated like a Chinese restaurant in Ireland in the 1990’s; the food was nice enough though but too dear.  Because we are lazy and outside the resort looked like hassle, we had lunch and dinner there though.

In the afternoon I rang reception and enquired about the private pool.  So they did have some sort of a suite with a small figure of 8 pool that was not in use by anyone (not sure why upgrade not offered), so the kids and I had a happy hour or so there.

There was a pool side bar with American music playing that night but sitting by a drained pool is not conducive to anything!  The grounds were big and the staff would drive you around in golf carts if you liked, there was piped music in the gardens – think 1980’s Diana Ross re-released Chain Reaction.  A little bit bizarre.

After earliest possible breakfast at 7:30am airport transfer was included which was good, but check out took forever!  Even the driver was asking me what the hold-up was.  Think it was rookie staff was the issue.

So back to a Vistara flight this time in economy which I am not sure what was the difference from premium economy on the way down there!  The departure lounge in Cochin airport is full of Dutch armchairs for some reason.  It looks lie someone’s front room but hey it was comfy.  There were 2 makeshift clothes shops and that was it, so it was great as nothing for kids to nag for.

Day 18-19 –Farewell Delhi

Arrived in Delhi around lunch time and had pre-booked 2 rooms (cause couldn’t get family option) in the Radisson Blu (which we had used in other countries) that included breakfast and airport transfer in the rate and it had a good looking swimming pool.  Instructions were to meet driver inside gate 2, after waiting for what seemed like ages we rang them and driver was outside gate 2, sigh.  We had made it through 3 weeks with no Indian sim cards but luckily the hubby has a post-paid Australian mobile with roaming, which we had not used but it was great to be able to make that one phone call.  Driver was nice and hotel wasn’t too far despite mad traffic.  We were welcomed into the opulent marble foyer with sandalwood paste to the foreheads etc. back in real 5 star world.  As I was checking in and asking about family rooms my girl whispers to me she sees a sign saying the pool is closed!!!

OMG not again. So I ask them what the alternatives are.  They have a quick brainstorm and tell me the presidential suite is available for 30krps more for than my 2 booked rooms (which I take is not full presidential suite price!).  In for a penny in for a pound.  It had 2 bedrooms and they’d throw in access to a private garden for the kids.  Also there was access to the R lounge with complimentary drinks & snacks all day (some confusion about what was actually available cause I took it to mean gin & tonic, but was only the case 6-8pm where there was hot appetizers too, think it was soft drinks pre then).  We did go for quick refreshments there first before we were shown to our room.

Anyway that didn’t really matter as the presidential suite was gorgeous, starting with the entrance hall.  It was a huge apartment with marble walls and glass display cabinets with tasteful art.  It did indeed have 2 king bedrooms with beautiful marble ensuite full bathrooms.   It also had a living room, dining room, kitchenette, guest w.c., sitting room and office!  We have lived in smaller places.  Also there was a huge private garden from which, ironically, we could see the swimming pool which was on day one of being drained.  The kids went into tycoon mode and immediately took over the office and wrote out pay slips for us all.  Then they turned the whole place into an imaginary school, the 5yo was the headmaster who kept us in line with a tree branch that can only be described as a switch (archaic meaning).  When I say us I mean his sister & I, while dad watched a movie.  At some point we all watched the (Simon Pegg) alien movie “Paul” and bit of my fave “Back to the future III”, but we had appetizers and drinks to get to and yummy (one of the dearer @ 1800rps) buffet dinner to fit in.  Am happy to report that the kid’s dinner was free.  We had a quick explore that evening and the spa looked lovely complete with yoga room but we were out of time and funds!  They also had a Kashmiri store on site, the purveyor of which had a great chat with the girl and I who gracefully accepted I wasn’t buying anything.

When we got back from dinner, of course, there was a turn down service and chocolates and cookies left out and a bottle of wine for the parents (which we passed on).  There were lovely bath salts provided so both adults took turns for a lovely soak – him while I was doing story time and me once the kids were asleep.  The girl had her luxurious bath on waking the next day. (The boy was happy with a shower).

After our final vast buffet breakfast, the lady who had checked us in saw us off and assured us of her service the next time we are in Delhi.  Our final driver was very amenable too.

Day 19-20 – Flying high

Check in was painless.  Did minimal shopping and spent our last 45mins in Delhi in an Irish bar that had photos of our Dublin 8 neighbourhood all over the place!  Kids were pretty good on the flight, although the boy had no leg room as a young French woman in front of him (and her companions in front of the rest of us) insisted on having her seat fully back at all times.  Air India staff were useless for making people put their seats up at take-off, landing & meal time, although they did announce it they didn’t come around to enforce it.  Then the cheeky bitch in front of the boy complained (in English) when he touched her seat.  I calmly explained to her he had zero room due to her actions and she conveniently did not comprehend English at that point.  I am not afraid to admit I lost it, more than bit, and she shut up.

The kid behind me also kicked my seat but I did not turn round and complain to her even though I do not recline my seat if at all possible.  That’s the way it goes in cattle class, buckle up!

Movies for me: Infinitely Polar bear (parenting/bi-polar movie appropriate in this case!), Baby Driver (surprisingly good), Wonder woman (how can Gal Gadot be so beautiful?) and Life of Pi (which had 2 of our India locations in, also v.g. movie).  I think the boy watched Minions 3 at least 3 times back to back!

Day 21 – Home

Never slept a wink and kids slept for about an hour! Then we got from the airport to Central station on automatic and the trains were replaced by buses to half way home!  The boy passed out on the bus and then the train when we changed over.  I was half thinking of going straight to work originally, but that was crazy talk.  Got home, showered and collected the dog from The Hound Dog hotel where she’d had a great time and who couldn’t believe we’d come back 🙂  Hit the hay for the afternoon 🙂

Hotel Summary

The Leela Palace, Chanakyapuri, South Delhi

Stars: 5 or 6

Family suite: No (or not available on booking.com)

Wifi: Good/Free

Car service: Expensive

(5500prs airport 10km so 550rps per km = Exorbitant,

40,000rps day trip Agra 176km so 227rps per km = not as bad value as airport run!

Delhi tour 800rps per hour plus 1500rps for guide = compared to airport run it’s a bargain)

Pool: Heated/outdoor

Food: Excellent / very expensive

Service: Butler / Treats to room / Gifts for kids

Free Extras: Gym

Spa/Massage on site: Yes

 

The Vivant by Taj – Malabar Coast – Willingdon Is., Cochin

Stars:  5

Family suite:  Not exactly but suite had living room fold up beds brought into / walk in robe so plenty of room for luggage

Wifi: Good/free

Car service: Medium price, they tell you of other options too

Pool: heated/outdoor

Food: Very good / expensive – lunch buffet 1000 rps

Service: Butler / Treats to room / Gifts for all on check out

Free Extras: Sunset cruise on backwaters/Afternoon tea/Kids biscuit decorate/ Kids post office visit / Gym

Spa/Massage on site: Yes

 

The Raheem Residency, Beach Rd., Alleppey

Stars: 3

Family suite:  No

Wifi:  Terrible/Free

Car service: No

Pool: Heated/outdoor

Food: Good / medium

Service:  Standard

Free Extras: No

Spa/Massage on site: Yes

Recommend/Would go back: Yes

Palm Tree Heritage house boat, Kollam harbour

Price: All-inclusive 26000rps plus tax

Stars: 4

Family suite: N/A  2 bedroom boat

Wifi: No

Car service: Yes / ok price

Pool: N/A

Food: Very good/Plentiful/Included

Service: Cook/Guide/Captain.

Free Extras:  Canoe excursion / Walkabout with spice plants

Spa/Massage on site: N/A

Recommend/Would go back: Yes

Palm Tree Heritage, Odayam beach, Varkala

Stars: 3

Family suite: Yes

Wifi: Patchy/Free

Car service: Yes / ok price

Pool: N/A as on beach

Food: Average/OK price

Service: Restaurant hit & miss/Housekeeping Manager attentive/Owners Personal Service excellent

Free Extras:  No

Spa/Massage on site: Yes

Recommend/Would go back: Yes (mainly cause of Babu the owner)

Greenwoods Resort, Kumily, Thekaddy

Stars: 4

Family suite: No

Wifi: Good/Free

Car service: Yes / ok price

Pool: Outdoor/unheated

Food: Good/Buffet best price 700 rps

Service: Very Good

Free Extras:  Traditional dance/ Cooking demo/ Periyar Documentary / Miniature onsite farm tour/ Playground / Saree-Dhoti wearing demo / Games room / Gym

Spa/Massage on site: No

Recommend/Would go back: Yes

The Panoramic Getaway, Chithirapuram, Munnar

Stars: 5

Family suite: Yes

Wifi: Good/Free

Car service:  Yes/expensive

Pool: 2 heated – one adults only J

Food: Good / Expensive

Service: Good

Free Extras: Games room & Playground & Gym

Spa/Massage on site: Yes

Recommend/Would go back: Yes

 

 

The SAJ earth resort, Nedumbasherry, Cochin

Stars: 3.5/4

Family suite: No

Wifi: Medium/Free

Car service:  Yes/included airport drop off in room rate

Pool: Surround pool but not in mid Jan//Private pool available

Food: Good / Expensive

Service: Medium

Free Extras: Games room & Playground & Gym

Spa/Massage on site: Yes

Recommend/Would go back: No

Radisson Blu, Delhi airport

Stars: 5

Family suite: Yes but not via booking.com- On asking at hotel we got Presidential suite incl. private garden (double the price of 2 business rooms)

Wifi: Very Good/Free

Car service:  Yes/included airport drop off in room rate

Pool: Yes only not in mid Jan

Food: Very Good / Very Expensive, buffet 1800 rps

Service: Good / Butler / Treats to room

Free Extras: R Lounge – food and drink gratis 6-8pm / Gym

Spa/Massage on site: Yes

Recommend/Would go back: Yes